


I Wish I Were Heather

by 6lytherin



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: Gen, Jealousy, Song: Heather (Conan Gray)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:13:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25987216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/6lytherin/pseuds/6lytherin
Summary: Based on the song Heather by Conan Gray••Alex is in love with Zach but unfortunately he only has eyes for Chlöe.
Relationships: Zach Dempsey/Alex Standall
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	I Wish I Were Heather

_ I still remember _

_ Third of December _

_ Me in your sweater _

_ You said it looked better _

_ On me, than it did you _

Alex wrapped his arms around his body in a failed attempt to make himself warmer. It was 10 pm and he was standing outside in nothing but a T-shirt and not so warm sweatpants. He knew he should have dressed warmer but he was kinda stupid when it came to common sense situations.

He could feel his lips beginning to quiver as Zach made his way over to him. Why the fuck did Justin want to have a bonfire in the middle of December??

“Hey Alex! Why are you over here by yourself?” Zach was already tipsy, making his way towards unbearably drunk soon enough. Alex only had one beer, not really feeling the party mood everyone else seemed to be in.

“I don’t know.” He shrugged, still shivering. Zach just stared at him for a moment before shoving his red solo cup into Alex’s hand, not giving him time to refuse.

“Zach, I really don’t want this.”

He watched as Zach pulled his gray sweater over his head and pushed it towards him. He couldn’t help but notice how attractive Zach looked pulling the sweater over his now messy hair.

“Here. Now you can stop shivering and actually have some fun with me.” He smiled.

Reluctantly, Alex took the sweater and pulled it over his own head and immediately felt the warmth spreading through him. It was very warm and smelled so much like Zach that he couldn’t help but blush and breathe in as much as possible without making it noticeable.

Zach was smirking when they made eye contact again.

“What?” Alex tried to sound annoyed as if it would hide the blush spreading across his body. Thank God it was freezing outside so he could blame the redness on the cold weather.

“It’s so big on you, it looks cute.” Was all he said before being swept away by Justin.

_ Only if you knew _

_ How much I liked you _

It wasn’t long before Alex realized that he maybe had a teeny tiny crush on Zach. He always knew he has some weird, indescribable feeling about the other boy but he thought it was just jealousy. Zach was popular and attractive, and all the girls loved him. He thought for so long it was just a feeling to be him, not a feeling of wanting to be WITH him.

The moment Alex realized that yep, he was practically in love with Zachary Shan-Yung Dempsey was on a Saturday night. Zach had a huge fight with his mom earlier that day and somehow ended up crashing with Alex. So here they were, laying on Alex’s small bed practically cuddling each other as a movie played in the background. Alex could feel Zach breathing against him which made his heart race.

He tried to steady the butterfly feeling he kept feeling each time Zach moved the slightest, making their arms or legs rub against each other. Each touch from Zach made his skin burn and his stomach ache. He wanted to savor the feeling of the other boys warm skin on his own.

Alex didn’t sleep that whole night. His mind racing and heart beating rapidly all because of the boy laying next to him.

_ But I watch your eyes, as she _

_ Walks by _

_ What a sight for _

_ Sore eyes _

_ Brighter than a _

_ Blue sky _

_ She's got you _

_ Mesmerized _

_ While I die _

“Has anyone seen Zach? He was supposed to give me a ride home and I can’t find him anywhere.”

Clay was the first to answer him. “I’m not sure, Alex.”

“Did you check the boys locker rooms? I haven’t seen him since lunch though.” Jessica finished putting her books in her bag and looked up. “If you wait a second I’ll help you look for him.”

He nodded and pulled his phone out, sending a quick text asking where said boy was.

They said their goodbyes to Clay and Tony before heading down the hallway towards the locker rooms. Jess made conversation about how some guy in her math class made her angry today but Alex zoned out. All he could think about was why Zach would just ignore him?

Alex felt his heart shatter as he watched Zach leaned up against a locker talking to Chlöe Rice, Bryce Walkers ex girlfriend.

“Oh wow,” Jessica laughed. “Look at Zach.”

Alex wanted to disappear as he watched Chlöe laugh and lean into Zach. They were so obviously flirting and the more Alex stared the worse he felt. He didn’t even realize Jessica had been talking to him.

“Huh?” He whispered. She looked at him softly, almost as if she knew. But there was no way she knew. Alex barley even knew how he felt.

“I can take you home, Alex.”

He let her guide him back towards the front doors as his mind raced. He officially hated Chlöe.

_ Why would you ever kiss me? _

_ I'm not even half, as pretty _

_ You gave her your sweater _

_ It's just polyester, but you like her better _

Alex spent his entire weekend thinking about Zach and Chlöe. Did Zach really like her? Why did he like her?

He currently sat on his bed, staring at the wall as music played softly in the back ground. He grabbed his phone and quickly found Chlöe’s Instagram. He scrolled through her photos, staring and comparing himself.

He was nothing like her. He was a boy, which he was 99% sure Zach would NEVER date a boy because he wasn’t gay. Alex didn’t even know if he was gay. He liked girls, he had loved Jessica. All he knew was that he was deeply in love with Zach, and it was breaking his heart.

He could never be as perfect as Chlöe.

Monday morning finally came and Alex couldn’t wait to see Zach. He ignored Zach’s invitation to ride with him to school for reason he didn’t know. He just felt like he should say no so he did. He hadn’t seen Zach or Chlöe all morning, but Alex was NOT looking forward to seeing her.

He stood by his locker and fumbled with the combination. He could never get the damn thing to open. He heart her voice before he saw her and as soon as he looked up he wanted to die.

There Chlöe was wearing the exact sweater Zach had let him wear months ago. His vision went blurry as he watched her smile and laugh, holding Zach’s hand as they walked through the crowded hallway.

Alex felt the tears swell in his eyes and his throat felt tight. He looked away right as Zach looked towards him and he turned, heading straight for the bathroom. Tears fell from his eyes as he choked back sobs.

He loved Zach. He knew him, way better than Chlöe could. He wanted and needed Zach more than anything in the whole world and now it seemed any chance he could have had was gone.

Zach would never want him. He’d never want to hold his hand in the hallway at school. He’d never kiss him. He could never be half as amazing, half as pretty as Chlöe was.

He would always be stupid, boring Alex.


End file.
